This post was written by Erin Norton, RN, BSN, MBA, director of Community Outreach, Parkview Women’s & Children’s Hospital.
When it comes to childbirth, it’s no surprise that mom and baby are the stars of the show. After all, it is mom giving birth, and baby who everyone has been waiting to meet. What’s often overlooked is that the birth of a baby is also the birth of a family. Everyone in the family plays an important role and sometimes, especially in the beginning, there’s a tendency to discount dad’s role.
The media often portrays men as second-class parents, at least in the early days. Men are shown to be klutzy around newborns and comical in the way they try to care for a baby. They are often captured as clueless and ill-informed. What a disservice to all the great dads out there! Men are perfectly capable of being gentle, nurturing, capable and competent caregivers.
For all of the fathers supporting and loving their families – thank you. You are appreciated.
What would happen if, instead of poking fun at dads, we looked for ways to uplift and encourage them? Instead of downplaying dads’ contributions, wouldn’t it be great if we would instead seek out ways to support them? Let’s start today.
8 ways to show dad some support
Check in on his mental health. A new baby means a lot of change and new responsibilities. How is dad coping? Is he experiencing a lot of stress or feelings of anxiety or depression? Help is available and recognizing the need is the first step.
Mentor him. Some men are fortunate and have a great dad who has set an example. Others may not have had a good male role model growing up or don’t have anyone close by now. A man who has experienced fatherhood and knows some tips and tricks may be able to help him navigate the road ahead.
Ask him questions. Are you just asking mom the typical questions about how baby is sleeping or eating? Dad can answer, too! Imagine how frustrating it would be to be a dedicated and involved father, but to have no one ask you these common questions?
Include him. If you’re providing education about childbirth, parenthood or baby’s health, make sure to include dad. Be intentional about it and not just as an afterthought. If dad is caring for baby, we expect him to be competent and soothing. Let’s all make sure he has the tools he needs to do the job right.
Think about the big picture. When you’re thinking about policies that support families, are you considering dads? How do things like family leave affect fathers? Learn as much as you can and keep this in mind when you vote.
Encourage him to be healthy. A new baby is a great motivator to improve your health. There has never been a better time to quit smoking, ditch the sugary drinks for water and improve your diet. Dropping off some healthy meals or snacks for the family can be a great start.
Be a friend. Becoming a dad is life changing. He’s probably got a lot on his mind. Can you listen? Can you assure him that he’s going to be great?
Laugh at him. OK, so we don’t have to completely give up our sense of humor when it comes to dads. When he tells a corny dad joke, give it a chuckle. It probably isn’t that funny, but he’ll get better with practice.